28 October 2011

unchanging grace.

it's been a long day already. i'm harrowed and spent, and i'm sure little m feels the same.



there are moments in most every day when i wonder if we'll ever get the hang of this, if i'll ever be any use at mothering. and right now, and in every now, the only remedy is Him.



down&up







on the occasions i manage to look outside of me, God's fingerprints are everywhere. the burnished oak out back. bean fields scraped clean. the soft oval of my sons' face. it's mercy, all of it, flooding straight from a Father who never retreats.



i rest on His unchanging grace.

* * *

would you keep praying for us, please? and if you don't mind, tell me how i can pray for you today.

thank you, friends.

26 comments:

Farmgirl Paints said...

praying for you right now. it's the hardest job in the world.

if you want you can pray for me and my big chick. we would love to find that close friend. you know the everyday friend. it's a void.

Jenn said...

You are never far from my thoughts friends. God's the master of love. And you have a jillion friends across the globe rooting for love to grab hold too. Hang on...it's coming!! HUGS!!

TheUnSoccerMom said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
TheUnSoccerMom said...

Praying for you and little M and your whole family. I think of you all often and pray for you all each time you cross my mind and heart.

if you will say a prayer to calm my fears about Christen going off to college next fall, I would so appreciate it. It's going to be a God thing, me being okay and getting through it all.

And you're in the middle of a God thing too. It will all bring Him glory. (((HUGS)))

Ostriches Look Funny said...

Of course I will pray for you and yours. You have a hard job...but things are changing, all the time!
I loved the burnished oak part of this. Burnished Oak! So mysterious and magical. Where DO we live anyway?

Small Town Joy: said...

Oh how I pray for you. It is so hard to be the mother and be rejected, not accepted. And to be the child, so confused and afraid. I pray.

I would love for you to pray about our sweet girl's case. Rights have been terminated, and are now in appeal. I want this child to grow and learn to love the real version of Jesus. Not the version that allows crude conduct Monday-Saturday and only a portion of goodness a few hours on a Sunday.

Bless by Tone said...

praying for you - and if you would please pray for my student, she has decided to terminate her pregnancy on Wednesday, please pray God shows her another way

Karen Siddiqi said...

Praying right now. If you want to pray for me, please pray for peace around big decisions in my life and for my eyes and ears to be open to God's leading.

Captain Murdock said...

Oh, praying for you and M. As I'm on my way to meet our MB, I would love prayers for the peace that passes all understanding - mostly for MB, but also for us.

Sarah said...

Will pray. I remember in college learning about William Carey (the great missionary) in college. Someone once asked him what he attributed his great success to, expecting an eloquent answer. Instead he said, "I can plod. I can persevere in any definite pursuit. To this I owe everything."
So much easier to sprint to the finish line than to put one foot in front of the other at the start of a long journey. You are doing hard work. May His mercies be new every morning.

autumn's dizzy thoughts said...

Praying for you, your family and especially M., We were only weeks behind you, out of Ethiopia. Times were stressed but optimistic. If you could, please pray for my new little man, S, and his legs. We are still in casts

lauren said...

mmm... your soul melting pictures of autumn just inspired plans for an impromptu walk in about 20... what is it about the very day that can shield my eyes from the miracles happening rich tout side my window. it's craziness.

a friend of mine adopted a little love from uganda and had a very difficult time in the transition with bonding and behavior etc... she said she had to undo everything she thought she knew and start again.. almost like he was a baby. holding him like a baby etc... she might have some tips? at least a heart that truly understands? i would be happy to pass on her info if you are at all interested. praying for a love that goes beyond and a peace that transcends. :)

Southern Gal said...

I would love to pray for you. Grace and mercy, gifts straight from the Father.

Flower Patch Farmgirl said...

Nic, you know I'm praying. And I can't thank you enough for doing the same.

Also, while I'm here, our flurry of texts over the weekend channeled into a dream about you and your posse. I remember a lot of noise from the many wild children between us. Also, your Mr. spoke with a British accent.

Heather said...

I just *know* that day will come when this time will be but a fleeting thought in your memory. I began praying as soon as I started to read your post. I immediately sensed that the Lord has a mighty strong bond building between you and little M. It's invisible, but it's there and growing. You are the most important person in his world and that means so much. The emotions of it all don't match what's truly happening through the prayers. You're so wise to ask for them.

And since you asked... my husband's safe return.

Mindy said...

I will pray for you tonight. God is so very good, even when circumstances are not. Would you pray for the health of my parents. Both are ailing and I am praying that it is only a temporary thing. Also that we would learn whatever God is trying to teach each of us through this time. I know that every hardship is filtered through His fingers of love, and He WILL work good from it. I want to be pliable for the molding work He is doing in me. Thank you.

elizabeth said...

Praying for you and yours. We have two beautiful grandbabies "grafted" into the family, one at birth, one at age two...with the older, the bonding, the trusting takes time...but it comes.

Jorth! said...

Praying hard for you, and often. You are so brave, dear friend, and so strong. I want to be like you when I grow up!

emily wierenga said...

oh nic.

the soft oval of his face. the burnt crimsons outside... the depth of his eyes and him desperately needing yet resisting you... don't stop, friend. your efforts are not in vain. keep on, in love, and us praying, always. xo

Shasta said...

Prayers, love and light headed your way Momma.

Please pray for my ministry Create H.O.P.E Designs, I long to make a difference for the millions of orphans in the world. I know I can, but some days it's just really hard, the crisis is so big and I feel so small.

TheUnSoccerMom said...

Thought about you and prayed for you A LOT over the weekend. As I was driving to church last night, I took the long way there and the sun light was so pretty setting over the cotton fields. I wanted to stop and take pictures, but I was running late. I did think of you and pretty much knew if you captured that view, it would be even more beautiful!

If you're able to, go to my blog today and you'll be blessed. Two of my favorite youths from church singing "How Great Thou Art".

Thank you for your prayers. love you!! :o)

lulu and family said...

"...from a Father who never retreats."

so thankful, nic, for this truth. those pictures are amazing. each one seems to tell a story. i could take them in all day. thanks for asking. praying. wish i could give you a big hug..and little m, too. bless each one of you with faith and patience this week.

happygirl said...

I'll pray for you and m. I couldn't BEGIN to ask you to pray for me. Just thy will be done will do. :)

Rebekah said...

my goodness, this is lovely, we don't have fall colors yet this far south.

You know, I have these types of thoughts regularly regarding my firstborn. I heard once (and it stuck with me) that God gave us children to do a work in us, not just for the children to grow up. Somedays I ask Him, "Are You done with this yet, please???" I will pray for you, if you'll pray for me for the same thing!

melyssa said...

You can pray for me to remember to stop and pray...

hannah singer said...

he never retreats! amen!
praying for y'all!!
xo

Psalm 63:7-8
"For you have been my help, and in the shadow of your wings I will sing for joy. My soul clings to you; your right hand upholds me."

1 Peter 5:10-11
"And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you. To him be the dominion forever and ever. Amen."