02 May 2011

humble pie. again.

'tis that time of year when the weather makes a resolute turn, and tepid skies displace bouts of spitting snow. so on friday i headed out for my inaugural jog of the year, a scenario which ends, invariably, with me choking down a hefty slice of humble pie.

i seem to replay the same scene from this tragicomedy every year. you’d think i’d know the lines by now, but nope, it still surprises me. i’m coasting along, joints loose, breath easy, inwardly gushing at the opalescent sky and flowering shrub trees and how the evening sun sheens the whole neighborhood glittery soft. and then it happens: precisely at the one mile mark i am seized with the distinctly horrifying urge to toss my cookies for all the good townsfolk to see.

and so i wilt for a moment on the grass, pretend to stretch whilst fervently beseeching God to please keep those cookies where they belong lest i become the first person in the history of public exercise to die of acute embarrassment.

the sheriff rolls by in his brown car, surely wondering if he needs to bust out his resuscitation skills. it’s all i can do to smile and eek out a nod.

after the waves of nausea calm, i start back home at a far less perky pace, my muscles aching with a mix of humility and lactic acid and the reminder that this? is maybe what happens when one hasn’t run since last september. right. got it.

i have learned my lesson, and shall never again set out at such a jaunty clip first run of the season.

at least not until next year.


cue the sun. finally.

this week's thankfuls:

133. may. is. HERE. (t minus twelve days till we leave to meet our youngest)
134. possibility
135. snaking afternoon bikes along the driveway, sans jackets
136. the way em says 'tithes'
137. balmy walks in borrowed shoes with a friend who dreams in a familiar frequency
138. an email laden with affirmation
139. a God who gives us a part in this magnificent adventure


happygirl said...

I can't run. I envy you. I just try to walk very fast.

Jeremy and Ann LeVan said...

You're so funny! Thanks for sharing...hilarious.

elizabeth said...

Loving this post...my favorite being t minus twelve days. Can't wait til we all share in the joy of you bringing him home!

Sarah said...

At least you're out there. That's more than I can say for myself :) Restarting is the worst.

TheUnSoccerMom said...

I feel ya about getting sick in public... the first few times I went to the gym, I would get that "feeling"...

May! I'm counting down the days w/ you. :o)

Unknown said...

where do you live that you have to stop for the winter? can't remember. so very excited for you to leave in 12 days for at least a visit!

grey rose (they/them) said...

you are funny:) bless your heart!
counting down those days with you-wow!

Vonda said...

This made me laugh so hard....after I read WHY you felt sick!!! Reminded me of the time my husband talked me into going for a MANY mile bike ride, after not riding a bike for years. At the end of our ride I plopped down in some strangers yard, gasping, panting, hoping I wouldn't puke, when a car stops to ask me if I'm okay. I sit up and say "I would rather deliver a baby sideways than do this bike ride again"!!! Little did I know I WAS pregnant with my son Noah.....but he came out the regular way, not sideways, ha ha ha.

Heather said...

counting the days with you :)

Mommy Emily said...

lol... this is poetic and hilarious, dear nic! oh how i miss running, but i also remember when i was first learning, and the terrible urge to toss those cookies. doctors have said not to run because of baby, so i am biking instead, which is wondrous. love to you. xo

amy luella said...

so funny! love the way you see this humor in getting "back into shape." great picturing you in the grass nodding to the sheriff.=) it has been a LONG time since i have run (other than after the babes). this is a sweet push to make time for it again. 12 minus days and counting!=)

Heather said...

counting the days with you :)

Jeremy and Ann LeVan said...

You're so funny! Thanks for sharing...hilarious.